In my previous entry, I wrote that I received the best anniversary gift that I could ever hope for. It was actually I'm being pregnant for the second time. It was so unexpected as I had some late period episodes before.
So, in March, when my period was late, I bought the cheapest pregnancy test. Why the cheapest? This was because I always spend my money buying these stuffs but never get positive result.
I did the test after got back from work and to my surprise, I got 2 pink lines. I was so happy that I cried in the bathroom. It was 2 clear lines, not like when I was pregnant with Eya. Just to confirm that I really am pregnant, I decided to visit my obgyn. He scanned but it cannot be seen as I was only 4 weeks at that time. He did a urine test and confirmed that I was really pregnant. He informed me that my EDD will be on the 30th Dec 2009.
I straight canceled my Bangkok trip and decided to sell or change the tickets. I bought material for my pregnant shirt to be worn during Hari raya. I even think of names for the baby, a girl and a boy's name.
I was really happy and keep counting the days. I even registered again at the BabyCenter website for this second pregnancy. I was so happy.
Then, on Monday,11th May, around 11.30 am, I felt like I was having a lot of discharge. When I checked on it, it was bleeding. Not reddish, just pinkish but it filled up the whole pantyliner. I cried and called both hubby and mom. I didn't know whether it still can be saved or not, but I really want it to be safe.
I decided to visit my gynae. He scanned the fetus and it has a small pulsation, which mean it still alive. However, my condition is called threaten miscarriage, which later I might miscarried the baby. He gave me a few progestoren pills and I was injected with some progesterone hormone. I will have another scan the next week.
During the whole week, before the checkup, I was bedrest and just hoping for the best. I had some brown spotting on Saturday, which worried me a little bit.
Monday came and we went to have the checkup. The doctor scanned the baby and could not see anything. He told me he was not happy as at 8 weeks the baby should have grown and clearly to be seen in an u/s scan. So, he ordered me to have a detailed scan at the radiology.
The wait to be scanned was hell. I had to drink couples of litres of water and vomited afterwards. Although I was not a radiologist, I could see the fetus have no heartbeat. I was sad but I have prepared myself for this situation.
So, the next day, he informed me that I had to undergo a DnC procedure. At this time, I was terribly sad but I could not shed any tears. I just think that I'm lucky to have Eya. If this was the first baby, I would crack so much.
The procedure was okay but when I was awake, I was crying. Maybe, it was my subconcious mind. The fetus was given to me and hubby decided to bury it at the surau near mom's home.
Really, I am sad that I lost my second baby but everything happens for a reason. I will still remember my baby always and love it no matter what. The baby will always be in my heart and mind. The baby will always be my second child.
I will remember you always, no matter what...
A decade has passed...
Me and hubby declared as a couple on 30th April 1999, which made yesterday, 30/4/09, a total of 10 years we had been a couple. He proposed to me to be her girlfriend on the phone at 2.30 am. after making several hints before that. I agreed without thinking and that decision was among the best decision I had ever made.
We had a few obstacles along the way before we were married. If he was not that strong, witthout the support and encouragement, I wouldn't be what I am today.
We never really celebrate the day we became a couple but this year, we had the best present we could wished for. What is it? I couldn't really reveal it right now but I might write about it later.
To hubby, I love you so much. Thanks for everything especially for the gift.
What kentut have to do with Eya and Hubby?
Hubby and Eya were watching tv, while I was doing something in the kitchen (I think). Suddenly, hubby shouted, "Sapa ajar Eya ni? Tak senonoh."
I asked why and hubby told me that Eya farted in front of his face. It began when Eya complained that she smelt something smelly. Hubby thought she wanted to 'bom-bom'. Then, suddenly, Eya turned her back to hubby's face and farted at him. Poor hubby. He was so shocked that his lovely little princess could throw a dirty trick upon him.
I bet she must got this trick from someone at the nursery.
Eya's Mak is no longer available...
Eya had her mak since she was almost a year old. I didn't give her mak but she started using it when I sent her to nursery, which asked me to buy it for her. Why? They told me she took other baby pacifier and it would be good if she got her own pacifier.
So, to make it easier for her to be in the nursery, I bought her first pacifier. The orthodontic Avent pacifier for 6 months and above. I never know whether the orthodontic is good or not. Is it proven to not damage a baby teeth development? What I knew back then, I wanted to give her the best pacifier. I never know that this would be my biggest regret in raising her.
Although she had her mak, she don't use it for a long time. She only look for it when she wants to have her nap or when to sleep at night. Only when she turned 2, I limit her mak to only at night before sleep. She also do not bring her mak to nursery anymore when she turned 2 years old.
I decided to wean her off her mak before she turns three. It still a long time before she reach 3 years old but I really need to act fast.
So, my mom devised a plan. She told her that the mak was full of ulat and need to be thrown away. Suprisingly, she believed it and didn't take her mak. However, at night, she couldn't sleep and my mom gave in.
So, we tried again the next day. I hid the mak and told her, opah had threw it into the large green dustbin. She didn't believe it. So, I took her outside (it was raining at this time, I was so determined) and showed her the empty dustbin. Luckily, that day was the garbage collection day. So, she believed it but was cranky for the whole day.
She did asked me politely, "mama, nak mak". I think she was just trying her luck with me. I told her the story of how her mak was full of ulat. She didn't ask for her mak anymore after that.
Because of her need for the mak, I have a collection of her mak. One is in my weekend bag, one is in her opah's home and another spare is at my home. We started her with Avent and finished with Japlo. Still the orthodontic type.
Until today, it has been 5 days since we weaned her off the mak. Because of the missing mak, we couldn't really have a good night sleep as she keep waking up at night. This is the price we have to pay for weaning her off the mak.
I want Talentime...
I am a great big fan of Yasmin Ahmad and Afdlin Shauki. I always and will watch every movie that they produce.
So, a few days ago, I wanted to watch Talentime. I asked my lil sis to join me.
Once we got the counter, confidently we asked for 2 tickets. Then, the girl said, the only show available was at 6. At that time, it was still early. We were so surprised.
The show was released, about 2 weeks ago. How come the showtimes is so limited? As what my sis said, maybe they want to move it to make way for Jangan Tegur.
Why they movie industry need to be so biased? You can try to fight fair. Usually, Afdlin and Yasmin's movie are given limited showtimes, not like movie produced by Mr DT, YH and so called Prof.
They do have fans so please give them better oppportunity to sell their movies.
I really need to find place and time to watch it.
Free Burger for hubby...
We had Burger King @ Alamanda for our dinner last night. Hubby being a fan of Whopper ordered ala-carte, while I ordered the medium set. As for me, I tried the new Salsa Grilled Chicken. It was quite nice.
In the middle of munching and finishing our burger, suddenly hubby stood up and went to the counter looking angry. Turned out that hubby had just bite a piece of plastic in the burger. The manager went into the kitchen to ask who had prepared the burger. We thought the plastic must have been the cheese plastic.
He apologized and gave hubby a new burger. So, hubby ate almost 2 Whopper last night.
Good Luck to you...
I'm the type of person who believe in monthly salary. I had never been an adventurous person and is truly afraid of taking big risks. It is totally opposite with my other half.
Just yesterday, he made quite a huge decision. Being his partner, I need to support him. Although I would never do what he is going to do, I need to believe in him.
The first time he went into business, he was cheated by his friend. And that strengthen my believe that a business is very risky. During this time also, we experienced such a hard life. Back then, we were still a couple but as a girlfriend, I just could not abandoned him.
So, now after being married for several years, with much bigger responsibility and expenses to be paid every month, he decided to try his luck in business. As a wife, I need to support his decision. I gave him my green light and wish him for the best.
He resigned from his company a few days ago as he was very busy doing his job and managing his business. In this one month, he will be concentrating on the start-up of his business. Even, MIL has approved his decision and even helped him on some matters. All his siblings were really supportive of his decision.
BTW, this time his business partner will be his childhood friend and I truly hope this will work out successfully.
Don't worry abang. I will give you my support. I believe in you and I do hope you will do well this time.
