I think I'm paranoid...

I knew everything about hubby's history...every little part of it...I also knew his ex and she was a friend...not a close friend, but we can say hi everytime we met until a day when suddenly she stopped acknowledging me. Its not that I care but I just feel weird, why was the sudden change?

So, I happily married with hubby up until when a few years ago, hubby called and informed me that she is now one of my SIL staff. Yes, its mean that she have access to hubby's family. She may know whatever is happening with the family. I didn't know why I cried when I heard the news. Maybe something deep inside of me was not that secure.

She was quite close to both of my SIL, as she was quite a charmer when she dated hubby. I'm more on the reserved type, and being almost 20 years younger, I'm not that close to my SIL. I don't know if they know that I'm uncomfortable knowing that she is close to them. I do hope they understand what a women would feel if the ex is still in close relationship with a guy's family.

I tossed away that insecure feeling from my mind after hubby keep consoling me that he no longer have feeling for her. Both of them, hubby and her, have their own family now. So, feeling okay with that, I keep reassuring myself that nothing will happen. SIL will be professional and will not ever mix business with personal stuff.

Then, last night, before sleep, hubby revealed to me that the woman's father gave MIL a taxi ride from SIL house in Subang to Nilai. I was so shocked and all the past feeling and emotions came rushing back. Maybe it just a sincere help of offering a taxi ride or simply a business. Still, I'm not sure of the woman intention. Out of all the taxi in KL or even Selangor, why the help come from someone that I'm not comfortable. People may say it none of my business since it was a deal between my SIL and the driver, but still why him?

To make things worse, she even send her daughter to one of the school I'm thinking of sending Eya. Why fate is so cruel? It been almost 10 years and I still cannot escape from her. My SIL think it is good since I can send Eya to school together with her daughter. She even can get a ride from her father as it seem that he fetch her daughter everyday from school.

Hubby really do not understand my feelings. He said there is nothing to be worried. It just purely coincidental and she means no harm. She just offering her help, with regards to the ride. I'm feeling so insecure knowing that everything can happen nowadays. Something, men are being so naive. Deep in my heart, I really feel she is up to something. I don't know what but it hurts me to think that she is in the same circle where my family is.

Is it just me being stupid and emotional or is it just fate playing cruel tricks on me???